Our fate is always a mystery to us. We never know what will happen to us and there are saying, expect the unexpected of life. Indeed, life is full of possibility and many others.

As to some of you might know, my visa renewal has been pending for almost half a year. I started to wonder why Allah put me in this position. This is one of the greatest test that he ever put on me. I started to quenstion why. Questioning my own creator. But I didn't get the answer, at least straight enough.

This week I was on the edge, I was like telur dihujung tanduk. The situation is like this. The immigration withheld my passport since the day I lodged my work permit application and next week on July 3rd, 2008 was the day I suppose to leave the country in case my application was declined. So I have 5 days before i'm leaving Auckland for good, yet I don't have my passport with me.

My reaction was, I was calm. Seriously I wasn't so gelabah like how I should react. I don't know there's something in me that makes me or made me more perservere or should I say in malay, aku lebih sabar.

Now I see why god put me in this ultimate test. Yes having no visa is an ultimate test for me. I wonder how people out there coping when they got less saving yet have to self sufficient for 6 months without incoming money. Seriously I would go crazy but I keep sabar.

To let you know, I was never known for my sabarness. I like everything quick. If thing turns custard I'll change my will and way. But this time, I stick to it. Focus on one and believing to One- my dear almighty lord Allah.

In this period of time, I learnt the power of god. I learnt that the real meaning of doa- the weapon of muslims.

Not being braggy, but I woked up early in the morning for weeks and month to sujud in front of him praying my hajat to be granted. On my prayer, I let my chest out and tawakal to his will. As I ran out of effort- I wrote to minister and complaint to member of parliament yet nothing work so far. So Him was the only resort I have. The only source I can put my hope for.

He answered my prayer. He answered my parents' prayer. He answered my friends' prayer.

Wish granted on the holy day of Friday 27th June 2008. On the last week before I leave this country. Do you know that I was born on Friday? Moving on, I was returning from Solat Jumuah, and there were this inner urge to check my email the voila good news for me. I can't stop saying syukur to Him. For giving a second chance. For giving me yet another gift. Thanking him, for putting me in this situation there must be a reason why. A reason or two that I already figured out.

Sabar and faith, were the testament of this test and trial that he put me into.

Also, I would like to take this opportunity to my friends who have been supporting me emotionally, financially, and any possible words that end with "ly" and for those put my name in your prayer, thank you so much people. My heartiest gratitude to Graeme- my kiwi friend who has been helplessly helping me since day one and until now. You're the man. Thanks also to my ultimate adik Halimah for her stubbornness to help me (yes there were time I refused her lending hand to me) and your stubbornness has bring me forward. Thanks to Ryan for her daily emotional support and consoling me and also for being a liaison with my family. And thanks to all other that I can't single out here, may Allah bless you.

2 Responses to “Trial, tested and testament”

  1. [siti]

    good for you dude. finally after the very long wait.

    have your time there. enjoy it while u still can and while your heart still need it. once you're ready to come back to this tanah tumpah darah, we'll hang out reramai and celebrate the triumph of your hardship there, and your return here.

    cheers!!~


  2. Ed

    yeay cik mah i like tat...rindu gile nak karaoke kat tanah melayu


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